Equality at Home

Why we argue about the washing-up and how to stop

“Equality at Home explains why arguments about the washing-up or getting the kids ready for school are never simple and often leave both halves of a couple feeling hard done-by, even when they’re both trying to divide the domestic chores equally.

“It’s a fun read and will help couples of all kinds who are committed to equality see just what they’re up against—and perhaps find a way forward. Domestic equality is probably still impossible in practice, but you can at least get to the point where you stop having blazing rows about loading the dishwasher.”

Heather Widdows, author of Perfect Me: Beauty as an Ethical Ideal

About the book

Why do you make such a mess when you’re cooking? Will you ever stop nagging me about the hoovering? When did you last help the kids with their homework? I did the shopping like you asked, but you’re still giving me that look.

While it’s often women doing more than men, inequality and arguments about fairness can upset the lives of couples of every stripe and flavour. Sometimes it’s just annoying, sometimes it can feel much, much worse. Repeating the same arguments over and over doesn’t change anything.

In this smart and entertaining book philosopher Helen Beebee and psychotherapist Matthew Elton dig into the dynamics of inequality in the home. They explain why the same old arguments don’t work, but also why this is no reason to give up. The fixes aren’t as simple as you might have hoped, but the practical suggestions in this book show they’re not as impossible as you might fear.

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